Rebuilding Social Skills Post-Pandemic

It’s hard to believe, but five years have passed since the Covid pandemic began, and the world has changed in profound ways. One of the most significant shifts was the widespread adoption of remote work. While remote work existed before the pandemic, it was not the norm. Another major change was how we spent time with friends and family. Our social dynamics have transformed, and with that, so has the way we interact with others.

We now find that our social batteries are different. Our approach to connecting with people has changed, and so has our sense of self. But what does this mean for us?

For many, it leads to:

• A tendency to isolate
• Discomfort with in-person interactions
• A desire to hide behind a phone or computer
• Difficulty maintaining or making new friendships
• Increased anxiety over safety and comfort

Imagine this shift like opening the curtains to a bright sunny day after being in the dark for a long period. It’s overwhelming, exciting, disorienting, full of hope, yet full of hesitation. The isolation we've experienced has affected our people skills, leading to increased judgment, criticism, low self-worth, self-doubt, and conflict.

While this shift affects everyone, let’s focus specifically on adults, as children and adolescents face these challenges differently due to developmental milestones. Ask yourself: Have you noticed a shift in how you make and maintain social plans? Is there a sense of disconnection in your relationships? Do you carry more anxiety than before? Do you find yourself withdrawing from social events or facing more conflict with your partner?

If you’ve answered yes to any of these, it’s clear that rebuilding your social skills is important. Here are some practical steps to begin reshaping your social toolbox:

Steps to Rebuild Social Skills:

1. Opt for phone calls instead of texts or emails. There’s a personal connection in hearing someone’s voice that text often can’t replicate.
2. Use opposite action. If you feel like canceling plans, practice doing the opposite and go. You’ll likely feel better afterward than if you’d stayed home.
3. Stay creative with long-distance connections. Regular FaceTime or video calls with friends and family can help maintain meaningful relationships.
4. Challenge yourself to step out of your comfort zone. Try joining a social group or attending a networking event.
5. Seek out spaces where new friendships can form. Platforms like Bumble BFF, Meetup, or local social media groups are great places to meet people.
6. Challenge negative thinking. Fight cognitive distortions like assuming everyone is judging you or that you’ll always fail in social situations.
7. Give yourself (and others) grace. Social interactions may feel awkward, but everyone is adjusting to this new dynamic.
8. Create small moments of connection. A simple “hello” to someone in an elevator or a brief chat with a coworker can keep your social muscles active.
9. Don’t overwhelm yourself. Take gradual steps, rather than overloading your schedule, which can lead to burnout.
10. Practice active listening. Show others that you value their thoughts and feelings.
11. Use “I” statements. Express your needs and feelings clearly without sounding accusatory, which promotes healthier conversations.

Finally, make sure to balance your efforts with self-care and time alone. Social skills take time to rebuild, and it’s okay to take breaks when needed.

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